enter, stage right…

We are home from 10 happy days with my parents, and being back in the den feels so good… The Professor had a scrumptious feast for us to enjoy upon our return, and it was so lovely to sit down to a meal with him at our table. Knowing our time together is finite, my foxling and I enjoy every single moment we find with him, and today was another bittersweet reminder of the crazy life we are about to lead. Anyone else out there attempting to lead a life less ordinary, doing it their own way; looking at a challenge as a mountain to climb and conquer ? New and exciting possibilities present themselves, and you begin to think WAY outside the box, somewhere past left field, past constraints. You begin to believe again that you can color outside the lines; scribble wildly with sparkly paints, create something just for you… and as exciting as it all is, it still scares the shit out of you at times ! When my life was just my own, I never had any qualms about steering the rudder; occasionally grounding myself in a foot of water and sand, and enjoying the mighty effort of pulling upright again. Yet as a mumma, I am reminded daily of the fact that there is someone totally dependent on me, and the desire to make her life as rich and happy as possible is causing me to want to keep the boat upright at all costs. Mentally, it is a bit like signing up for a jaunt over class 4 rapids, all the while knowing I never paddled in anything above a class 2, and I am about to have my ass handed to me without ceremony. Exciting, frightening and a little nauseating, all wrapped up with a good dose of laughter and one small hand in mine, her voice egging me on… What am I going to create today, with these 24 hours ? A bit of lessons, decaf on the patio while taking turns reading aloud, a long walk in the rain with my foxling, and 30 second dance party seem to be a good start. We are home, and I feel welcome and loved. Good way to start the rest of my life. =)

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